2.10.12
Personal Introduction Criteria Sheet
Name: ________________________ Partner:________________________
Essay Criteria
Write an essay where you express who you are in a deep and personal way. You must choose a partner to be your audience for the paper.
____ 1. Thesis Statement: (Explicit or Implied) Re-write it in the space below.
_____________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________
____ 2. Introduction: Circle which kind of introduction you used.
____ 3. Transitions: Do your paragraphs flow refer back to the thesis?
____ 4. Evidence: Prove your point with specific examples.
Stories from your life that relate to your thesis.
____ 5. Conclusion: What kind of conclusion did you use?
Summary
Restate and emphasize the thesis
____ 6. Writing Focus:
“Our” vs. “Are” must be correctly used.
Use complete sentences. (No fragments or run-ons)
____ 7. Grammar, punctuation, and spelling checked.
Grading Scale:
F-D: Brainstorm HW
C: Brainstorm HW and Draft Following Organize Format
B: Brainstorm HW, Draft, Peer Review
A: Brainstorm HW, Draft, Peer Review, Final Draft
If you have access to a printer, you must type and print your final draft.
Sample Essays:
Introduction
Charles Spurgeon, a Baptist preacher, once said, “A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget –me-not’s have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on tombstones”. I do not wish to die with a tombstone that reflects a meaningless name. My name, Carolyn Elizabeth Stuart holds value to me because of everything that stands behind it: my family history, my own history, and the future that I hope to create for myself.
3 body Paragraphs
I come from a long line of Carolyns. I don’t particularly like the name but I like the people that had it. We are strong, powerful women; educated, hardworking, mothers, sisters, aunts. We are loud when we need to be heard, and silent when we want to listen. We are extraordinary even when we are ordinary. We are bigger than our names but our names bind us together.
My own history has made my name even more important. When I was younger I pretended that I was the Great and Powerful “C”. So special that calling me by my full name wasn’t necessary. “C” was all you needed. Then as I grew older I realized that your name is what you make it. It could mean something evil if I was evil, it could be something funny if I was funny. I made sure everyone knew what Carolyn Elizabeth Stuart was made of. My name became a part of me.
I have a future that I am not sure about. I want to see the world. Eat new foods. Meet new people and see my name in lights. I want to live in New York City and I want to live in California. I want so much that it is hard to keep track of everything. The one thing I know for sure is that my name will stay with me.
Conclusion
The name Carolyn has meaning to me. But not the way people would traditionally think. It holds my past and it holds my dreams. It has become a symbol for me of where I am from, who I am, and where I hope to go. It may not sound special to you, but it means the world to me. When I die, I hope it means the world to others as well.
Essay Criteria
Write an essay where you express who you are in a deep and personal way. You must choose a partner to be your audience for the paper.
____ 1. Thesis Statement: (Explicit or Implied) Re-write it in the space below.
_____________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________
____ 2. Introduction: Circle which kind of introduction you used.
Anecdote
Quote____ 3. Transitions: Do your paragraphs flow refer back to the thesis?
____ 4. Evidence: Prove your point with specific examples.
Stories from your life that relate to your thesis.
Descriptions of your beliefs, values, or character traits and how they shape your choices.
Descriptions of your skills, activities, or passions and why they are important to you.
____ 5. Conclusion: What kind of conclusion did you use?
Summary
Restate and emphasize the thesis
____ 6. Writing Focus:
“Our” vs. “Are” must be correctly used.
Use complete sentences. (No fragments or run-ons)
____ 7. Grammar, punctuation, and spelling checked.
Grading Scale:
F-D: Brainstorm HW
C: Brainstorm HW and Draft Following Organize Format
B: Brainstorm HW, Draft, Peer Review
A: Brainstorm HW, Draft, Peer Review, Final Draft
If you have access to a printer, you must type and print your final draft.
Sample Essays:
Sample Personal Introduction Essay with “Quote Introduction”
Introduction
Charles Spurgeon, a Baptist preacher, once said, “A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget –me-not’s have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on tombstones”. I do not wish to die with a tombstone that reflects a meaningless name. My name, Carolyn Elizabeth Stuart holds value to me because of everything that stands behind it: my family history, my own history, and the future that I hope to create for myself.
3 body Paragraphs
I come from a long line of Carolyns. I don’t particularly like the name but I like the people that had it. We are strong, powerful women; educated, hardworking, mothers, sisters, aunts. We are loud when we need to be heard, and silent when we want to listen. We are extraordinary even when we are ordinary. We are bigger than our names but our names bind us together.
My own history has made my name even more important. When I was younger I pretended that I was the Great and Powerful “C”. So special that calling me by my full name wasn’t necessary. “C” was all you needed. Then as I grew older I realized that your name is what you make it. It could mean something evil if I was evil, it could be something funny if I was funny. I made sure everyone knew what Carolyn Elizabeth Stuart was made of. My name became a part of me.
I have a future that I am not sure about. I want to see the world. Eat new foods. Meet new people and see my name in lights. I want to live in New York City and I want to live in California. I want so much that it is hard to keep track of everything. The one thing I know for sure is that my name will stay with me.
Conclusion
The name Carolyn has meaning to me. But not the way people would traditionally think. It holds my past and it holds my dreams. It has become a symbol for me of where I am from, who I am, and where I hope to go. It may not sound special to you, but it means the world to me. When I die, I hope it means the world to others as well.
26.9.12
Student Questions 2012-2012
- Why is it ok to join the army but you cannot smoke or drink until you are 18 and 21?
- Why do Christians believe they are right?
- Why are people close minded?
- Why are we here? What is the meaning of life?
- Why don’t people believe in God?
- What do I want in life?
- Why are there no jobs but they still recruit people for the army?
- Why does Philadelphia have a high murder rate?
- Why do people use violence to solve problems?
- Why do they continue to build jails but do not fund schools?
- Why does OHS care more about wearing vests than education?
- Why do I act the way I do?
- What can I do to better myself?
- Why are people still racist?
- Why do people want to live where there is no free speech? (What is free speech?)
- Why do people want change but they are still killing each other?
- What am I capable of?
- Why do people believe that if they do good that good things will happen to them and vice versa? (Is Karma true?) What is Karma?
- What do you stand for?
- How honest are you?
- Am I content with myself?
- Why does the world set untouchable standards?
- Who will I become in the future?
- What is the point of bugs?
- Do you want to change the world?
- Are you ready for college?
- Why are people mean?
- Why do people give up on themselves?
- Why don’t people give money to homeless shelters?
- Why don’t famous celebrities and wealthy people give money to those who need something? (Should there be redistribution?)
- Why don’t people live their lives to the fullest?
- Are there aliens?
- Why do people follow trends?
- The Illuminati - Conspiracy Theories - Truth and Fiction - Power
- Why do I act the way I do when I know I’m smart?
- Why do people fight and kill each other when we are supposed to be brothers and sisters?
- Why do they treat catholic schools different from public schools?
- Why are there so many struggles in life?
- Why do the Democrats and Republicans oppose each other?
- Why are there so many wars going on?
- Why are most schools in Philadelphia only concerned about image? (Uniform, AYP, etc.)
- Will other planets ever become habitable?
- What are my morals?
- What are my political views?
- Where is my place in the world?
- Do I have a calling in life?
- Will I be a good parent?
- Why is it so hard to get a really good paying job?
- Why do they give drug dealers more time in jail than rapists?
- Why is Philadelphia violent?
- Why is the world divided by class?
- Why does the world believe that war will solve everything?
- How will my life turn out?
- Why do people bully?
- Why is everyone mad at the US?
- Why does China make everything?
- Why is Romney/Republicans trying to take away foodstamps?
- Why is the world so ugly?
- How smart am I?
- How do they know about the weather?
- Why do people stress?
- Why does life have to be reversed so much? (We take one step forward but 2 steps back?)
- Why is my race hated on?
- Why has our culture been through so much pain and stress?
- Why is there still racism?
- Which race has the nicest hair? (Social Constructs of beauty)
- What does it take to be a good person?
- Will I be successful? What is success?
- Why isn’t college free?
- Why does race matter?
- Why do we have to die?
- Were African Americans ever the minority in crime?
- Why are African American children expected to fail?
- Why are women looked at as less than nothing in some countries?
- Why does society tell us to be ourselves but judge us when we do?
- Why are black people killing each other?
- Why do people believe in different jobs?
- Why are there so many poor people?
- Why does college cost so much?
- Why is violence necessary to solve a problem?
- Why is life rough?
- Why are there so many dropouts?
- Do we have to go to school to be successful?
- Why is money everything in the world today?
- Why do people lie?
- Why can’t immigrants come to the US?
- Why do we work for money?
- Why does money rule the world?
- Why are people judgemental?
- Who is my father?
- What is family?
- Why is there still poverty?
- Why is there still discrimination?
- Why is there no peace in the world?
- Why care about anything?
- Why continue?
- Why don’t black people have good hair?
- Why do we fight?
- Why do we struggle?
- Why do we have to stay in school for 12 years?
- Why is politics so important?
- Why is there so much violence?
- Why does the police have so much power?
- Why are we so ignorant?
- Why is this generation like this?
- What does it mean to be “ghetto”?
- Why do blacks start violence?
- Why are we black?
- Why do different “hoods” have “beef”?
- Why do people feel left out?
- Why don’t people finish high school?
- Why doesn’t this school follow up when rules are broken?
- Why is there so much violence in the inner city?
- Why is it hard to get a job nowadays?
- Why do people lie?
- Where does all the hate come from?
- Why do people make fun of eachother?
- Why am I here?
- What am I to accomplish?
- Why are boys so immature?
- Why is everybody dying young?
- Where am I going in life?
- Why do we feel pain?
- When did different cultures start interacting and reproducing together?
- Why are there guns?
Major Themes: Materialism, Poverty, Politics, Education, Prison Systems, Redistribution and Taxes, Opportunity, College Costs, Being Stuck, Existential angst, Purpose in life, Money and Power, Conspiracy Theories shaping the world, Violence, Conflict, Class division and Segregation, Family, Justice
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